How can we remove the power from such a word?

This subject has been the bane of my life as a young adult. The N-word, whether it's spelled with "er" or "a" I still feel no different when it comes to the overwhelming amount of pain that carry for myself, my people and our heritage. In my opinion, we mustn't use such a hurtful word in retaliation. Who are we retaliating against? Honestly, my fore parents have been enslaved by White Americans, Europeans, Asians, Hispanics, Native Americans and most of all ourselves, African Americans and Africans.So who are really retaliating against. It's nothing but a huge contradiction. So my question stands, how can removes its power if no one is teaching the history of this word? Does anyone really know were it derived from? It was a word used by the Ancient Egyptians but the spelling and meaning of the present-day is completely different from the past. It's spelled Ngr or en-ger which means "God". And it was later mispronounced by the Latins as "Ni**er".Knowing the origin allows progress